Try Bossing Instead of Bitching
I’m thrilled 2016 is over, but maybe not for reasons you’d expect. Sure, some sucky things happened. Ok, a lot of sucky things happened, but you know what? A lot of good happened, too. What did you choose to focus on? Pessimism is addictive, and it sure feels like the majority of the citizens of social media got high off of a communal pessimistic attitude. Misery loves company, right?
Sure, I buy that, but is that really the way we want to live? How many people who posted something negative on Facebook, for example, took action to the injustice they were feeling? Did your action stop on social media?
I’m not saying it’s wrong to be upset. If you know anything about me, you absolutely know that’s not what I’m saying. I believe whole heartedly in the importance of honoring your feelings. You are right to feel what you feel because you are feeling it. Period. Now, let’s take that period and turn it into a semicolon.
Your job as a worldly citizen does not end with your shitty feelings, at least not if you want to live a purposeful, intention-filled life.
Bitch (V.): To complain endlessly without coming up with any real solutions. Passive.
Boss (V. Well, it’s a verb now.): To take action, be in charge, and change your fate. Active.
Get it? Be your own boss. In Elton John and Tim Rice’s Aida, the Nubian Princess-turned-slave says to her new owner, who happens to bitch to her excessively, “If you don’t like your fate, change it. There are no shackles on you, so don’t expect any pity or understanding from this humble palace slave.”
And this doesn’t end in the social media world of politics. I know, from personal experiences, it can also be true in our careers. I stunk of pessimism for the majority of November and December. I became addicted to bitching and sulking. And what did it accomplish? What did I book, learn, or even gain pleasure from the sole act of bitching? Nothing. Nada. Zilch.
Again, was I right to feel crummy? Sure! But I noticed, over time, I started to lean into that crumminess. Feeling crummy started to feel comfortable. I started to become extremely lethargic. That scared the hell out of me. Where did all my excitement from when I first moved here go, and how could I get it back?
Well, after acknowledging my feelings and taking some time off in December, I took action. I chose to change from a bitch to a boss. I cannot sit, twiddling my thumbs, feeling feels all day, and waiting for my agent to call and give me an audition.
A successful actor creates.
I didn’t like the state of stagnation in which I found myself, so I created change. I signed up for two workshops and an improv class, and I got new head shots. I did these things not just to do them, but because, after research, I felt they were right for me at this moment in my career. Additionally, I finally started pitching a web series I wrote last year to producers and directors. While I don’t know what will happen to this project, at least I am taking action.
And we all have things we can do, but first, it’s our job to find those things.
We must find the steps to success before we can take them, but inevitably, we must take them.
So think about it. Where in life do you feel unsatisfied? What are you doing to change it? Don’t get stuck in the 2016 bitch-fest mindset. Instead, live in the present. Be a 2017 boss.
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